Our children are like the air that we breathe and we love them unconditionally. That goes without saying! But have you ever just wanted to go pee without someone running through or banging on the bathroom door shouting “muuummeee”. That’s when I started to realize that I definitely needed some me time!
Being able to sit and eat dinner without having to get up 5 times to get someone something. Even getting to finish a cup of coffee without having to separate siblings. 🙄
Its never ending!!
So when the opportunity comes along to have some time for me I am going to grab it with both hands.
Parent Guilt
Ever since my son was born Ive had this mum guilt every time I have wanted a minute to myself. Whether it be a trip to the hair salon or ditching the housework to sit and relax while my son napped. There was always that nagging guilt.
After all, I was a mother now and it was my job to keep busy. The only time I should clock off was when my son had gone to bed in the evening. That was after clearing a mountain of dishes, folding laundry and tidying the toys scattered across the living room.
Hubby was around to help and would often load the dishwasher while I was putting the little man to bed. But he was working through the day and I didn’t expect him to help.
Fast forward to my son being almost 11, and add a second child into the mix.. life is exhausting! Don’t get me wrong I am eternally grateful for the life we have and it would be way too quiet without them in it.
But when the opportunity crops up, I grab some time for me now. Maybe that comes with age 🤣 but man am I a grouch when Ive not had my coffee in the morning or a chance to catch my breath in the afternoon and recharge my batteries.
Mental Health
Ive come to realize that it’s not healthy to keep going and not give yourself a break. Everyone needs a little breather from all the craziness. Even in a full time job you get a break in the day. Your mental health depends on it. They keep you from drowning.
Having that me time really helps to keep my stress levels down. Depending on how you like to relax in the evening, its ‘your time’ Uninterrupted peace and quiet.
Perhaps that’s why many of us mums stay up late in the evenings because that’s the only precious time that we have to ourselves.
Many of my friends have messaged me in the evening saying they should be going to bed. Instead they are catching up with their favourite book or tv show they wouldn’t normally get to watch with the kids around.
I can easily park myself on the couch in the evenings. I try to squeeze as much me time in before I drag myself to bed knowing that it all starts again tomorrow lol!
That being said, that’s not healthy either. Having endless amounts of late nights and not getting enough sleep is not the answer. Early mornings are also in the ‘job description‘ of being a parent so it is important to get that proper rest too.
Which is why down time every now and then during the day is a must. If you are fortunate to have a partner, a family member or dear friend to help out take some time for you.
Alone Time Ideas
Here are some ways that I like to take advantage of me time, these are just things that I enjoy doing but each to their own;
- Go for a coffee and read a book in a cafe or even to a library
- Go on a shopping trip, even if it is just grocery shopping. I LOVE shopping alone, its definitely under rated lol!
- Get pampered, whether it be getting your hair done or to a spa for a massage
- Go for a walk ALONE, its invigorating seriously
- Meet a friend for coffee/lunch/wine and have that catch up that you haven’t had in so long (Best medicine ever)
- Go and see a movie with your significant other or even alone
- Get the kids out of the house so you can soak in a bath or chill and put your feet up for a bit. This obviously would involve a loved one having the kids and not literally throwing them out the house 😂
There are many ways you can spend recharging those batteries but it is important that you do so. Not only for yourself but for your kids too. My kids have seen me at boiling point and its not nice for them to see.
Not that you shouldn’t show your kids that you also have emotions but its also better for them to see you at your best and want to spend time with them without feeling completely exhausted.
Even letting them entertain themselves while you drink that coffee.
I usually get my two outside when things are getting too insane and I just need 5 minutes peace.
Seriously though it’s a huge deal to give yourself that time. First time mums will feel that guilt kicking in. But I assure you, your kids are healthy and loved. Let them watch their favourite tv show while you have 5 minutes. It’s not the end of the world.
Give yourself a break and have that glass of wine in the evening and don’t feel guilty. Your doing a great job 👍🏻
From one exhausted mum to another.. Cheers 😉🍷
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